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Tony's Online Tips
Reviews and commentary by Tony Isabella
"America's Most Beloved Comic-Book Writer & Columnist"

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TONY'S ONLINE TIPS
for Thursday, April 24, 2008

A la Cart

Darcy - seen here shopping for a frozen cream pie, Chap Stick, and dried food for her cat Johnny Rotten - reads every comic book and graphic novel she can get her hands on. She's taking time off from working in the kitchen of a nudist colony to pursue her dream of creating her own comic: Emo-tation of Life. But don't expect to see Darcy at your neighborhood comics shop.

She's not real.

A la Cart

"Darcy" is Hillary Carlip, one of two dozen people the author portrays in A la Cart: The Secret Lives of Grocery Shoppers [Virgin Books; $17.95]. Since she was a teenager, Carlip has been collecting discarded grocery lists. In this fun book, she created identities around some of those lists and, with the help of make-up artists and a photographer, became them. Her characters range from a wife-seeking redneck to a 80-year-old stand-up comedienne to an unhappy 11-year-old girl.

Carlip's mini-biographies are sometimes joyful, sometimes sad, but always entertaining. Barbara Green's photographs are amazing. Full of life and droll humor, A la Cart would make a spiffy gift for your family, your friends, and even yourself. It earns an impressive four out of five Tonys.

Tony Tony Tony Tony

******

LIGHTNING ROUND REVIEWS

Action Comics 863

Geoff Johns wraps up his six-issue "Superman and the Legion of Super-Heroes" arc in Action Comics #862 and #863 [DC; $2.99 each]. His first-rate writing combines with equally top-notch art by Gary Frank and Jon Sibal for an exciting, heartwarming finale. Johns' Man of Steel is inspirational and his handling of the Legion members - all of them - is right on the money as the heroes battle to save Superman's adopted planet and its citizens from uber-bigot Earth-Man, his super-lackeys, the threat of annihilation from outer space, and even their own demons. The earlier issues of the story were somewhat confusing, but Johns finished strong. He, Frank, and their collaborators earn the full five Tonys.

Tony Tony Tony Tony Tony

Batman and the Outsiders 3

I just read Batman and the Outsiders #2-5 [$2.99 each] and the series becomes more of a train wreck with every issue. To my dumbfounded amazement, writer Chuck Dixon gets most of the cast wrong. Though I am greatly amused by the notion of the late Ralph and Sue Dibny hanging around Batman as Topper-like ghosts, most of the characters are unrecognizable. Old friends Katana and Metamorpho act like strangers. Catwoman doesn't ring true. Grace is written with disrespect and Thunder with utter contempt. Black Lightning sounded way off to me. I was astonished Geo-Force calmly took being reassigned from the Justice League to this Batman-run farm team. The man was a king, for crying out loud. Green Arrow and Batgirl sounded okay to me, but I don't particularly care for either character so that didn't score any points. The storyline isn't interesting, the writing isn't engaging, and the art borders on awful. Save for Ralph and Sue, there's absolutely nothing for me to recommend here. These issues earn no Tonys.

No Tonys

Betty 173

Betty #173 [Archie; $2.25] delivered big fun with four entertaining stories. In George Gladir's "Fantasy Girl," Betty and friends imagine their lives if they had super-powers. In a second tale - "Getting the Message" - Gladir takes some well-aimed shots at teenage text messaging. It was as if he's been at my house when my daughter and her friends have sat around texting other friends instead of talking to each other.

Bill Golliher's "Unstable Table" shows Betty's first night at a waitress at an upscale restaurant, a debut complicated by Archie showing up with a date. Then Mike Pellowski celebrates spring with "Decision Maker." Such nice weather, so many possible choices for enjoying it.

Penciller Stan Goldberg and inker John Lowe do a terrific job on the visual end of these stories, as do letterer Jack Morelli and colorist Barry Grossman. As for managing editor Mike Pellerito and editor/editor-in-chief Victor Gorelick, all they do is make putting together a terrific comic look easy.

Betty #173 earns an impressive four Tonys.

Tony Tony Tony Tony

Buffy the Vampire Slayer 13

I caught up on Buffy the Vampire Slayer Season Eight last weekend, reading issues #7-13 of the Dark Horse series [$2.99 each]. Here are my quickie comments:

Brian K. Vaughan's "No Future For You" did some excellent work with Faith and Giles. Drawn by Georges Jeanty and Andy Owens, it's the best extended story in the series to date, even with a cliche-ridden climatic fight scene. I'd be up for Faith and Giles getting their own series.

Written by Joss Whedon and pencilled by Cliff Richards, issue #10's "Anywhere But Here" gets big heart-and-a-half points for the behind-the-scenes story of a one-shot character. But Buffy hasn't seemed quite herself since the new series launched and "Giant Dawn" has gotten boring.

Whedon's "A Beautiful Sunset" (issue #11) introduces the next "Big Bad" and leads into the next big story. I'm still not feeling the real Buffy here, but, to be honest, I thought the character was somewhat "off" in season seven as well. It's not you, Buffy. It's me. But we'll always have our memories.

"Wolves at the Gate" by writer Drew Goddard and artist Jeanty is shaping up as another good arc. It has nice stuff with Xander, Andrew, Dracula, Buffy snuggle sleepover pal Satsu, and some scary-powerful Asian vampires. I'm interested, I'm intrigued, and I'm looking forward to the next issues.

I don't see Buffy the Vampire Slayer Season Eight as an award-winner. But it's a solid comic book that, depending on the individual issues or arcs, earns anywhere from three...

Tony Tony Tony

...to five Tonys.

Tony Tony Tony Tony Tony

That's good enough to keep me reading.

******

BLACK LIGHTNING

Black Lightning

Today's Black Lightning news comes to us via TOT reader Justin Karguth who writes:

I snatched this picture off a video podcast. It is part of the DC Universe Classics toy line. Each wave comes with a Build-a-Figure. Black Lightning was this one. You know where you buy each toy to get a body part for a larger figure? Anyway, wasn't sure if you were aware. It would be nice if they had a variant head with hair.

To get a jump on answering the usual questions:

1) I knew there was another action figure in the works, but I wasn't aware of this. DC Comics has only once told me what they were doing with my creation...and that was when a DC staffer told me Dan DiDio decreed I could not be offered the Black Lightning Year One mini-series.

2) DC has still not paid me for the DC Direct figure of Black Lightning released last summer. Maybe the company spent my money on the Time-Warner lawyers trying to screw Jerry Siegel's heirs out of their rightful share of Superman.

I'm thinking we should run an online betting pool - with the money going to The Hero Initiative - on when DC will finally pay me what they owe me on the DC Direct figure. It took over two years for them to pay me for the HeroClix figure, so I'm guessing we're talking 2009 earliest. Sigh.

More Black Lightning news as it comes my way. I'm also hoping to review my character's most recent comics appearances in the next week or two. I'm all about hope.

******

BLOGGY BITS

I'd hoped to write a longer TOT for today, but my most recent change in blood pressure medication is causing some minor problems. I'll try to do better tomorrow.

This week's Tony Polls questions concern the publisher panels at the New York Comic Con and other events, Dark Horse's Buffy the Vampire Slayer Season Eight, the "Brand New Day" issues of Amazing Spider-Man, the recent Legion of Super-Heroes and Spectacular Spider-Man animated series, and Marvel's Secret Invasion epic. If you haven't yet voted on these questions, you can do so by going to:

www.worldfamouscomics.com/tony/poll

Tony's Online Tips is a reader-sponsored feature, made possible through your "Tip The Tipster" donations. Today's column and eleven more like it are being brought to you by a reader whose donation was the second-largest in TOT's history...and I thank him for his incredibly generous support. Thanks to readers like him, we're fully funded through this month and well into May. If you'd like to contribute as well, click on that "Tip The Tipster" link you'll find elsewhere on this page.

Thanks for spending a part of your day with me. I'll be back tomorrow with more stuff.

Tony Isabella

<< 04/23/2008 | 04/24/2008 | 04/25/2008 >>

Discuss this column with me at my Message Board. Also, read Heroes and Villains: Real and Imagined.

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THE "TONY" SCALE

Zero Tonys
ZERO: Burn your money before buying any comic receiving this rating. It doesn't *necessarily* mean there's absolutely nothing of value here - though it *could* - but whatever value it might possess shrinks into insignificance before its overall awfulness.

Tony
ONE: Buy something else. Maybe I found something which wasn't completely dreadful in the item, but not enough for me to recommend it when there are better comics available. I only want what's best for you, my children.

TonyTony
TWO: Basic judgment call. I found some value, but not enough to recommend it. My review should give you enough info to decide if you want to take a chance on it. Are you feeling lucky today, punk? Well, are you?

TonyTonyTony
THREE: This denotes something I find perfectly respectable. There are better books out there, but I wouldn't regret buying this item. Based on my review, you should be able to determine if it's of interest to you. Let the Force guide you.

TonyTonyTonyTony
FOUR: I recommend anything earning this rating. Unless you don't like the genre, subject matter, or past work of the creators, I believe you'll enjoy this item. Isn't it uncanny how I can look right into your soul that way?

TonyTonyTonyTonyTony
FIVE: Anything getting this rating is among the best comicdom has to offer. You should buy/read this, even if the genre/subject matter doesn't appeal to you. It's for your own good. Me, I live for comics and books this good...but not in a pathetic "Comic-Book Guy" sort of way.



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