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Tony's Online Tips
Reviews and commentary by Tony Isabella
"America's Most Beloved Comic-Book Writer & Columnist"

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TONY'S ONLINE TIPS
for Saturday, March 26, 2005

Alf Spring Special 1

Today's opening notes the start of "spring recess" here in my beloved Medina, Ohio. Searching for appropriate art to get things going, I found my choices limited to the above Alf cover or photos of scantily-clad debauchery. I went with Alf, but, if you really would have preferred the debauchery, you can pretend the character on the cover is actually me in all my hairy naked glory. We could be twins...and isn't that a heartbreaking reflection on the aging process?

My kids - Eddie (16) and Kelly (13) - are looking forward to this special time with Dad. Because I will buy them pizza and let them rent videos and take them to stores where I will pretend (at their request) not to be with them until they need me to whip out the credit card. It's the circle of life.

Tomorrow is, of course, Easter, the Christian day of rebirth. My first idea for an Easter column was to run photos of a dozen or so people I'm happy are one day closer to Hell. I probably won't go with that, but I suspect it will be a gloomy piece nonetheless. Or maybe I'll take the day off and gorge myself on the sugary flesh of chocolate bunnies. Candy good.

ALF SPRING SPECIAL #1 [Spring, 1989] featured an Invisible Man parody. The cover is by Dave Manak, who did a lot of this kind of stuff - sometimes drawing, sometimes writing, sometimes both - for DC, Marvel, and other companies. He was even an editor at DC for a while, but not long enough to be on my list of people I'm happy are one day closer to Hell.

I shouldn't have to say this, but that last line was a giggle. I can't think of anyone in comics who would rate a spot on such a list, though there are several rascals for whom swirlies and wedgies would not be amiss.

Let's see what else I have for you today.

******

2000 AD EXTREME EDITION

2000 AD Extreme 5

2000 AD EXTREME EDITION #5 [Rebellion; $5.99] is a mishmash of features with a general-but-not-religiously-so theme of "parodies." The Simon Davis cover features "Bix Barton, Master of the Rum and Uncanny" and illustrates the government investigator's second case. More on Bix in a bit.

Leading off the issue is "Twister," a Judge Dredd tale by John Wagner and John Ridgway. It's a so-so adventure which finds Dredd contending with would-be kidnappers who bear a distance resemblance to characters from the Wizard of Oz. When Dredd gets swept up in a twister, his rattled brain begins to perceive the resemblances as being far closer.

Next up are four "Invasion" stories by writer Gerry Finley-Day with artists Eric Bradbury, Carlos Pino, and Mike Dorey. Watching Bill Savage outwit and out-slaughter the Volgans who have conquered Britain is more fun than reading the features which were supposed to be funny. No one's going to raise "Invasion" to classic status, but the series does have a brutal charm.

The rest of the issue is given over to two way-too-long "Bix Barton" stories by Peter Milligan and Jim McCarthy. The title hero is a one-man "Department of the Irrational" whose bureau is getting the axe because he hasn't gone out on a case since vanquishing his arch-nemesis - "Steve Ditto, the Astrally Projected Man" - in 1940. The villain's name, sad to say, is the biggest laugh in the 60-plus pages which follow.

In the first story, Ditto returns, using toxic waste to turn men into monsters. In the second, he allies himself with a secret society whose obsession with the CARRY ON movies leads to multiple murders. I know British humor can be quite, well, humorous, but that isn't in evidence here.

Much as I hate to rag on any comic book that gives you over a hundred pages of material for six bucks, 2000 AD EXTREME EDITION #5 is woefully inadequate entertainment. Bill Savage earns it one out of five Tonys, but that's the best I can do for the issue.

Tony

******

CAPTAIN AMERICA DISASSEMBLED

Captain America Disassembled

The target audience for AVENGERS DISASSEMBLED: CAPTAIN AMERICA [Marvel; $17.99] appears to be those fans of AVENGERS DISASSEMBLED who now want to get the tie-in issues of titles they didn't buy at the comics shop. It reprints CAPTAIN AMERICA AND THE FALCON #5-7 and CAPTAIN AMERICA #29-32. I guess the collection suits the needs of those AD fans, but, for me, it wasn't a particularly satisfying experience.

The CAPTAIN AMERICA AND THE FALCON half of the book was a mite confusing, not uncommon with stories by Priest. I can forgive him this because eventually/usually he makes sense. But what's up with the one-name-only affectation? Is he planning to go on tour with Cher and Madonna? But I digress.

I like Captain America trying to live by his ideals in a world unkind to them. I like the Falcon's obvious respect for a partner who, on occasion, clearly makes his eyes roll in utter disbelief. I like the shadow play of the heroes doing their "good guys" thing despite the less-than-noble government/military types around them. I like the Joe Bennett/Jack Jadson art on these tales. I am having some trouble getting used to the Priest version of the Falcon, but I don't hate it. However...

The Avengers stuff was just a muddled mess to me, even though those personal moments between Cap and the Scarlet Witch were well written. In addition, I felt as if I'd been cheated out of the first half of Priest's story, which, in turn, made me somewhat resentful of the other stories in the collection.

I seem to have the worst luck when it comes to reading Robert Kirkman's Marvel stories. I keep hearing what a terrific writer he is - and saw evidence of that in his first INVINCIBLE trade over at Image - but his Marvel writing leaves me cold. So much of it feels like I've read it before.

There were some good things in these Captain America stories. I certainly don't mind seeing veteran villains like Batroc, Hyde, and the Serpent Society again, even though, as written by Kirkman, none of them seem formidable enough to make Cap sweat even a little as he defeats them. I liked Batroc being played as less murderous than his fellows...because a steady stream of killers gets boring real fast. I have a soft spot for the Cap/Diamondback romance and hope those two crazy kids can make it work.

What I don't have is any need to see the Red Skull ever again, especially in a stupid story where he's being armed by rogue SHIELD agents playing at being players and where he is subsequently taken down by a Nick Fury trick and made to look like a punk. The Skull was a classic villain; now he's a bore. We don't need World War II Nazis in our comics; we have legions of home-grown fascists all around us.

The discontinuity between the two story arcs reprinted in this collection, the lack of satisfaction I got from the first arc, the so-so writing on the second arc, and the sometimes too pose-y Scot Eaton/Drew Geraci art on that arc all cost AVENGERS DISASSEMBLED: CAPTAIN AMERICA points with me. On our scale of zero to five, this one gets two Tonys.

Tony Tony

******

COMICS IN THE COMICS

Elderberries

ELDERBERRIES is a relatively new newspaper comic strip by Phil Frank and Joe Troise. Here's the background:

"The Elderberries centers around Dusty, a cowboy whose middle- aged daughter has decided it's time for him to hang up his spurs and move to Elderpark, a retirement community. While there, Dusty meets the Professor, a great brain with a bad memory; Evelyn, who can still see well enough to drive at night; and the General, a veteran with bad hips and a lot of stories. Together, they deal with medications, the loss of youth, and their adult children while maintaining their humor and building their friendships."

I was introduced to the strip when several TOT readers alerted me to its strips for March 18, 21, and 22.

Here they are:

Elderberries

Elderberries

Elderberries

Those strips were enough to make me a fan of ELDERBERRIES and I've been following the strip ever since. If you'd like to do the same, you can find it at:

www.ucomics.com/theelderberries

******

TONY'S MAILBOX

Phantom

I've received a lot of positive feedback on my recent reviews of the Frew PHANTOM comics, so you can expect more coverage of the series in future columns. While you're waiting, here's a note from ED RHOADES, a friend of the Phantom:

I enjoyed reading your piece about the Frew Phantom comics. You can order Phantom comics directly from Frew for cover price and shipping. Many members of the US club Friends of the Phantom are subscribers. I've been getting a Frew in my mailbox every two weeks for years. Because of the change of currency, it's smart to order more than one year at a time. The exchange rate is strongly in our favor making a year's subscription about $115-120.

There are 31 issues a year. Of those, six are special issues. Each time a newspaper story, Sunday or Daily, ends a special issue appears with the complete story and some other Phantom treasures, like a classic Ray Moore, Sy Barry, or Wilson McCoy/Lee Falk story. The annual Frew blockbusters cost about $17 from Frew, including shipping and are the best buys a Phantom fan can make. I strongly recommend buying any back issues of annuals in stock.

Publisher Jim Shepherd doesn't like using email, but you can reach him by snail mail, fax, or phone. He also attends our Friends of the Phantom dinners in NY each spring. His contact information is in each Frew.

In what is probably our last Friends of the Phantom paper newsletter, I interviewed Claire Moore, Ray's widow, still going strong at 95, and a number of Phantom artists...one of which was Alex Saviuk, who is new to the Egmont team but who drew Defenders of the Earth comics years ago. Egmont is the Swedish company that generates the new Phantom stories Frew publishes every two weeks. Alex had his first Egmont story reprinted in Frew recently.

Thanks for the note, Ed. For more information on FRIENDS OF THE PHANTOM, I direct TOT readers to:

home.ptd.net/~rhoades

That's a wrap for today's column. Thanks for spending a part of your day with me.

I'll be back soon with more stuff.

Tony Isabella

<< 03/25/2005 | 03/26/2005 | 03/27/2005 >>

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THE "TONY" SCALE

Zero Tonys
ZERO: Burn your money before buying any comic receiving this rating. It doesn't *necessarily* mean there's absolutely nothing of value here - though it *could* - but whatever value it might possess shrinks into insignificance before its overall awfulness.

Tony
ONE: Buy something else. Maybe I found something which wasn't completely dreadful in the item, but not enough for me to recommend it when there are better comics available. I only want what's best for you, my children.

TonyTony
TWO: Basic judgment call. I found some value, but not enough to recommend it. My review should give you enough info to decide if you want to take a chance on it. Are you feeling lucky today, punk? Well, are you?

TonyTonyTony
THREE: This denotes something I find perfectly respectable. There are better books out there, but I wouldn't regret buying this item. Based on my review, you should be able to determine if it's of interest to you. Let the Force guide you.

TonyTonyTonyTony
FOUR: I recommend anything earning this rating. Unless you don't like the genre, subject matter, or past work of the creators, I believe you'll enjoy this item. Isn't it uncanny how I can look right into your soul that way?

TonyTonyTonyTonyTony
FIVE: Anything getting this rating is among the best comicdom has to offer. You should buy/read this, even if the genre/subject matter doesn't appeal to you. It's for your own good. Me, I live for comics and books this good...but not in a pathetic "Comic-Book Guy" sort of way.



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