There are so many things I want to write about today. I have my Spider-Man and Thor overviews on tap. I have a short box filled with things I want to review. I have a selection of odds and ends I want to write about sooner rather than later. Unfortunately, I seem to have come down with an acute case of...
I can't decide which of the above I want to write about. When I try to start writing about any of them, the words won't come out of my head or my fingers. So, to buy myself a few hours to recover from this debilitating ailment, I am presenting a selection of my recent Twitter tweets.
Why should I suffer alone?
"My post-Mid-Ohio-Con motto: I have no voice and I must nap!" (10/5)
"I am not the new publisher of DC Comics, but just imagine how many people would crap their pants if I were. It would be awesomely stinky." (10/6)
"Bad as they are, Cleveland Browns are well rid of Braylon Edwards. But I still hope he gets prosecuted for assault." (10/7)
"'I think this is the year the Indians or the Cubs go all the way.' Parallel Universe Tony" (10/8)
"Why are we bombing the moon when it was Mars that attacked us?" (10/9)
"Do I want to be a 'Tasmanian Lovemaking Devil'? Best male enhancement spam headline ever!" (10/10)
"Congratulations to all the Harvey Awards winners, but, come on, Beyonce had one of the best graphic novels ever." (10/11)
"Local health dept offers flu shots "for Infants, Children, & Parents 6 months of age or older." How many 6monthold parents are there?" (10/15)
"I'm home alone for most of the weekend. Must write columns, finish new series overviews, and defend house against criminals." (10/17)
ZERO: Burn your money before buying any comic receiving this rating. It doesn't *necessarily* mean there's absolutely nothing of value here - though it *could* - but whatever value it might possess shrinks into insignificance before its overall awfulness.
ONE: Buy something else. Maybe I found something which wasn't completely dreadful in the item, but not enough for me to recommend it when there are better comics available. I only want what's best for you, my children.
TWO: Basic judgment call. I found some value, but not enough to recommend it. My review should give you enough info to decide if you want to take a chance on it. Are you feeling lucky today, punk? Well, are you?
THREE: This denotes something I find perfectly respectable. There are better books out there, but I wouldn't regret buying this item. Based on my review, you should be able to determine if it's of interest to you. Let the Force guide you.
FOUR: I recommend anything earning this rating. Unless you don't like the genre, subject matter, or past work of the creators, I believe you'll enjoy this item. Isn't it uncanny how I can look right into your soul that way?
FIVE: Anything getting this rating is among the best comicdom has to offer. You should buy/read this, even if the genre/subject matter doesn't appeal to you. It's for your own good. Me, I live for comics and books this good...but not in a pathetic "Comic-Book Guy" sort of way.
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