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Tony's Online Tips
Reviews and commentary by Tony Isabella
"America's Most Beloved Comic-Book Writer & Columnist"

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TONY'S ONLINE TIPS
for Thursday, November 5, 2009

I'm too angry to write any more columns this week. I came to that realization when I found myself screaming "What's wrong with those people?" at six o'clock Wednesday morning.

When I speak of "those people," I speak of the bigots who have once again voted to deny our fellow citizens equal marriage rights, this time in the state of Maine. There may still be some hope for justice in Washington state, but, at the moment, my attention is on Maine. I find it cruelly ironic that the citizens who wisely voted to expand the use of medical marijuana could not find it in their hearts to support equal rights for gays.

"Those people" are also the usual suspects. Just as it did in California, where its money supported the hateful "Proposition 8," the Mormon Church poured money and resources into Maine to overturn the existing law allowing gays to marry. They even used the same fear-mongering commercials they had used in California, albeit with different actors. That these religious bigots, aided by the same Catholic Church of which I was once a member, have again achieved their vile goal pains me deep in my soul.

To add further bigotry to bigotry, about 700 Catholic bishops and priests are meeting in Columbus, Ohio this week in "an attempt to rescue marriage." Among the threats to marriage cited by these deluded fools: gays. Pretty imperious for a religion which spent decades protecting pedophiles in its clergy and trying to cover up the crimes of those monsters, even going so far as to recommend all reports be sent to the Vatican in diplomatic pouches to keep them out of the hands of law enforcement, concerned Catholics, and the victims of these pedophiles.

I am angry. I despise these bigots. I believe them to be an affront to God and our country.

Now I'm going to go move comic-book boxes until my arms, back, and legs hurt as much as my soul does.

I'll be back on Monday.

Tony Isabella

<< 11/02/2009 | 11/05/2009 | 11/09/2009 >>

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THE "TONY" SCALE

Zero Tonys
ZERO: Burn your money before buying any comic receiving this rating. It doesn't *necessarily* mean there's absolutely nothing of value here - though it *could* - but whatever value it might possess shrinks into insignificance before its overall awfulness.

Tony
ONE: Buy something else. Maybe I found something which wasn't completely dreadful in the item, but not enough for me to recommend it when there are better comics available. I only want what's best for you, my children.

TonyTony
TWO: Basic judgment call. I found some value, but not enough to recommend it. My review should give you enough info to decide if you want to take a chance on it. Are you feeling lucky today, punk? Well, are you?

TonyTonyTony
THREE: This denotes something I find perfectly respectable. There are better books out there, but I wouldn't regret buying this item. Based on my review, you should be able to determine if it's of interest to you. Let the Force guide you.

TonyTonyTonyTony
FOUR: I recommend anything earning this rating. Unless you don't like the genre, subject matter, or past work of the creators, I believe you'll enjoy this item. Isn't it uncanny how I can look right into your soul that way?

TonyTonyTonyTonyTony
FIVE: Anything getting this rating is among the best comicdom has to offer. You should buy/read this, even if the genre/subject matter doesn't appeal to you. It's for your own good. Me, I live for comics and books this good...but not in a pathetic "Comic-Book Guy" sort of way.



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