An absolute must-read! Hands down one of the best books I've ever read about relationships. You don't have to be married to appreciate this book. You can be in a budding relationship or one that may eventually lead to marriage. Whatever the case, there is something in this book you can learn and implement right away - to improve your relationship and make it one that will make you and your partner happy for years to come.
Why Marriages Succed or Fail If you are wanting excellent and easy reading on marriage, commonications and relationships in general buy any and everything by John Gottman
Why Marriages Succeed Or Fail - John Gottman This book provides excellent advice that is laid out logically, and is easy to understand and implement. A few simple changes can improve how your interact with your spouse.
This book succeeds! I use this book in working with couples planning to marry or when couples struggle, and they ALWAYS find answers. Gottman's style is respectable and accessible for "everyman," while still maintaining heady content for professionals. I recommend it for couples looking to learn better fighting styles and communication patterns, for pastors and professionals who work with couples in trouble, and for people trying to set the rules before they actually play the game. Great text!
Extensively Researched with Great Insights! John Gottman is a respected expert on relationships who has done extensive research with married couples over the past two decades to determine why couples stay together or part. Although Gottman's book is about marriage, it also has some excellent insights for understanding some of the important dynamics of long-term courting relationships. The book provides many exercises, quizzes, techniques and tips to understand and improve courting relationships.
Gottman notes that his years of research show that a lasting marriage results from a couple's ability to resolve the conflicts that are inevitable in any relationship. He also notes that there are three different styles of conflict resolution that healthy couples usually adopt. They are: the validating marriage (couples compromise and calmly work out their problems attempting to satisfy both people), the conflict-avoiding marriage (couples agree to disagree and rarely confront issues head on), and the volatile marriage (couples conflict often and the results are passionate disputes).
John Gottman also discusses what he calls "The Four Horseman of the Apocalypse." These are the dangerous ways of interacting that sabotage attempts to communicate. They are criticism, contempt, defensiveness and stonewalling.
Well written and informative, Gottman's research has uncovered some worthwhile and thought provoking ideas on long-term relationships. Understanding these concepts can be helpful when trying to understand oneself and when exploring long-term compatibility with a companion.
I found many useful concepts throughout the book. Overall a powerful work on strenthening relationships!
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